I'm older than you so I can say this endearingly, you're very wise. You already are experiencing and learning how to maneuver uncertainty that most will eventually fall into in their 30s and 40s.
Keep up the courage to take one step at a time because in life, that's the ONLY way forward. No one has the answers and lives that appear to be checking off boxes each will have their own setbacks -- that's just how life works.
As someone who is in the same stage as you in life, I live in a very expensive area of the US and it makes moving out virtually impossible at my age. The option is quite literally to rent and spend $3K+ on an apartment I’ll never own or live at home and save up. Thankfully, I’m blessed with a good family who supports me and makes home feel like a home (which not many people are fortunate enough to have this) and my job is conveniently near where I live. I’m working towards a career, pursuing my masters, saving money, and having enough leftover to invest in my hobbies/clothes/other things that I like. I feel that today’s culture has normalized leaving home when it’s not exactly necessary. I also think about it like this: there will be a time in your life where you’ll move out and it will be the last time you live with your family. So for now, I’m grateful to be where I am - it could always be worse!
However, remodeling your bedroom/bathroom definitely makes this experience A LOT better. Highly recommend investing whatever you can into making your space truly yours. Let’s continue to chase our dreams and be truly grateful for where we’re at in our lives, rooting for you!
i'm also learning how to take those baby steps as humiliating as they sometimes feel. when you're stuck it's like moving in slow motion through water, but at the end of the day, you're still moving
i loved this! just wrote something that feels along these lines- from my lavender purple childhood bedroom. i think looking at tangible reminders of my past (and past selves and dreams by extension) always makes me feel like my life is escaping me, but simultaneously, it reminds me that girl who had those big dreams and big feelings is still right here, in her room
This really spoke to me, I'm 20 and haven't started uni yet so I can't really relate to everything but I understand exactly how you're feeling. Especially the feeling behind at life. So many of my friends are already in uni or married and pursuing their passion while I'm still struggling to get my life together. Also has anyone told you have a very soothing voice? Honestly you should be a narrator or something haha. Anyways much love and please never stop writing! 💕
I promise that what you're feeling at 24 is so, so normal. Was in your place once. To answer your question, what's kept me "stuck" or prevented me from taking risks is being way too dedicated to my role as "the glue" of my immediate family.
i think sometimes the turquoise walls are just proof that nothing is going to change if we do nothing about it >.< which is empowering sure but equally terrifying….my childhood bedroom was sky blue and lime green, which I painted over with a dark navy blue when i was 14. it has 1 thousand tack holes in each wall, from the tiger beat posters i hung up in middle school to my tumblr-obsessed era, in which i printed out every (appropriate) photo of my friends and i, then hung them in neat rows, usually underneath an All Time Low lyric. this was the perfect quality blog setup, btw. iykyk.
anyways. my childhood bedroom is my moms craft/extra storage room now. i stopped staying in that room when my ex and i split…when i go home now, i stay in my brother’s childhood bedroom (still painted bright blue, with my late grandmothers chair in the corner). theres a metaphor in all of this somewhere, im sure…great read and listen btw ❤️
This struck a chord. The turquoise walls of our past remind us that chasing dreams is messy and sometimes painful, yet every struggle shapes our journey. Thank you for this honest reminder.
It's my childhood bedroom that I used to share with my sister who moved away and is now married and I can feel so behind! Though fairly often, I am happy where I am or learning how to be.
as someone who has moved a lot & doesn't have a childhood bedroom – i sometimes envy spaces that act as a sort of portal to your past... but that being said, feeling trapped and stuck there can be SO suffocating. i already feel like i'm regressing to the person i was back in high school while living with my parents (minus the childhood bedroom). remember to be patient with yourself and celebrate how excited little jolaya would be about all of the things you've accomplished thus far!! i am so proud of you and i know she would be too <3 (ps i love the audio format ur so audiobook!!)
I'm older than you so I can say this endearingly, you're very wise. You already are experiencing and learning how to maneuver uncertainty that most will eventually fall into in their 30s and 40s.
Keep up the courage to take one step at a time because in life, that's the ONLY way forward. No one has the answers and lives that appear to be checking off boxes each will have their own setbacks -- that's just how life works.
BTW - thank you for great nuggets in the piece.
Salud y paz.
Thank you, genuinely. You’re right! No one has the answers! We gotta take it one step at a time 🩷
I’m sitting in my childhood bedroom, my baby blue walls say hello to yours🫶🏽
stuck is not the same as stopped !! i needed this reminder, and i love the way you convey your emotions (in audio and in writing)
PRECISELY. WE'VE GOT THIS!! (also ty)
As someone who is in the same stage as you in life, I live in a very expensive area of the US and it makes moving out virtually impossible at my age. The option is quite literally to rent and spend $3K+ on an apartment I’ll never own or live at home and save up. Thankfully, I’m blessed with a good family who supports me and makes home feel like a home (which not many people are fortunate enough to have this) and my job is conveniently near where I live. I’m working towards a career, pursuing my masters, saving money, and having enough leftover to invest in my hobbies/clothes/other things that I like. I feel that today’s culture has normalized leaving home when it’s not exactly necessary. I also think about it like this: there will be a time in your life where you’ll move out and it will be the last time you live with your family. So for now, I’m grateful to be where I am - it could always be worse!
However, remodeling your bedroom/bathroom definitely makes this experience A LOT better. Highly recommend investing whatever you can into making your space truly yours. Let’s continue to chase our dreams and be truly grateful for where we’re at in our lives, rooting for you!
i'm also learning how to take those baby steps as humiliating as they sometimes feel. when you're stuck it's like moving in slow motion through water, but at the end of the day, you're still moving
i loved this! just wrote something that feels along these lines- from my lavender purple childhood bedroom. i think looking at tangible reminders of my past (and past selves and dreams by extension) always makes me feel like my life is escaping me, but simultaneously, it reminds me that girl who had those big dreams and big feelings is still right here, in her room
This really spoke to me, I'm 20 and haven't started uni yet so I can't really relate to everything but I understand exactly how you're feeling. Especially the feeling behind at life. So many of my friends are already in uni or married and pursuing their passion while I'm still struggling to get my life together. Also has anyone told you have a very soothing voice? Honestly you should be a narrator or something haha. Anyways much love and please never stop writing! 💕
Thank you so much for this read, Jolaya!🫶🏼
This was a beautifully crafted piece.
I promise that what you're feeling at 24 is so, so normal. Was in your place once. To answer your question, what's kept me "stuck" or prevented me from taking risks is being way too dedicated to my role as "the glue" of my immediate family.
i think sometimes the turquoise walls are just proof that nothing is going to change if we do nothing about it >.< which is empowering sure but equally terrifying….my childhood bedroom was sky blue and lime green, which I painted over with a dark navy blue when i was 14. it has 1 thousand tack holes in each wall, from the tiger beat posters i hung up in middle school to my tumblr-obsessed era, in which i printed out every (appropriate) photo of my friends and i, then hung them in neat rows, usually underneath an All Time Low lyric. this was the perfect quality blog setup, btw. iykyk.
anyways. my childhood bedroom is my moms craft/extra storage room now. i stopped staying in that room when my ex and i split…when i go home now, i stay in my brother’s childhood bedroom (still painted bright blue, with my late grandmothers chair in the corner). theres a metaphor in all of this somewhere, im sure…great read and listen btw ❤️
This struck a chord. The turquoise walls of our past remind us that chasing dreams is messy and sometimes painful, yet every struggle shapes our journey. Thank you for this honest reminder.
I have turquoise walls too! Hallo!
It's my childhood bedroom that I used to share with my sister who moved away and is now married and I can feel so behind! Though fairly often, I am happy where I am or learning how to be.
I understand all you write about here.
as someone who has moved a lot & doesn't have a childhood bedroom – i sometimes envy spaces that act as a sort of portal to your past... but that being said, feeling trapped and stuck there can be SO suffocating. i already feel like i'm regressing to the person i was back in high school while living with my parents (minus the childhood bedroom). remember to be patient with yourself and celebrate how excited little jolaya would be about all of the things you've accomplished thus far!! i am so proud of you and i know she would be too <3 (ps i love the audio format ur so audiobook!!)
Stuck is not the same as stopped!!
Excellent